Thursday, October 11, 2012

Are We There Yet? and Other Annoying Questions

If you have ever traveled any long distance with children older than 3 you will, no doubt, have heard a few of these complaints from the rear of your vehicle.

  • Are we there yet? My standard response: Pretty soon.
  • It's been "pretty soon." Are we there now?  Response: Does it look like we're there?
  • I'm hungry. Response:  You should have eaten your lunch.
  • The movie is over! Mom! The movie is over! Change it! Response: The movie has been over for one second. CHILL!
  • I have to pee. Response: Of course you do since there is nowhere to stop for the next ten miles.
  • I'm hungry! Response: Thanks for letting us know!
  • Because you're stupid and you buy candy treats to hand out occasionally... (PEZ 15 pack candy...less than $2.) Can we have more PEZ? Response: I just gave you some 10 seconds ago.
  •  I'm thirsty! I have to pee! I'm hungry! Response: Yay! All I see are cornfields!
  • Are we there yet? Response: Do you see Grammy and Poppa? No? Then I guess we're not there.
  • Can we have more PEZ? Response: Yay! It's been 5 minutes since I gave you a pack!
  • We stop to pee.
  • Back on the road.
  • Can we have some more PEZ? Response: Shove PEZ toward children.
  • I'm hungry. Response:  Me too. Maybe we should eat one of you kids.
  • Silence.
  • Nervous laughter.
  • **Quietly** Can we watch the movie? Response: PLEASE???? Kids: Please!!!!
  • **Slowly find new DVD and put in player.**
  • I don't want to watch that one! Boo! Life is so freaking unfair! Why do you hate me so much? I'm forced to watch a movie while riding in a vehicle instead of just looking out the window! Torture! 
  • **All kids zone out on movie.**
  • **Arrive home.**
  • **Turn off movie before the end.** (THE movie no one wanted to watch.)
  • WHHHHHAAAAT? It wasn't over! I wanted to see it all! I've seen it 4032 times but it's crucial I see the whole thing today! 
 Travel with children is super fun.

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