An ordinary night

In the beginning, his eyes are wide pools of melted chocolate fully focused on my face. His long, warm body wraps itself around my torso, cocooning, attempting to get closer than is even possible.

We begin to rock and as our bodies shift together, the rhythm induces a song from my lips. Some nights there are words; Beautiful dreamer wake unto me starlight and dew drops are awaiting me; or Hush a bye don't you cry go to sleepy little baby...when you wake you shall have all the pretty little horses. Tonight, only the hummed bars of Brahms' Lullaby.

Chubby fingers, not a baby's hands yet not big boy hands, lace into mine and guide me to chubby toes. My hand automatically wraps the foot in a caress. My thumb glides softly over smooth skin, back and forth, in time with our rocking.

Then I pause my song for just a moment in the repetitive concert, as though someone finally fixed the skipping record.

Mommy? Would you sing to me some more? Mommy? The words, surprisingly clear from behind ginkie, restart the murmured concert.

The shok-shok of ginkie is almost imperceptible. shok shok shok pause shok shok pause. There is no predictable pattern, as though he only sucks when he remembers it is in his mouth.

His hand absently rises to stroke the hair at the back of his head, a habit begun as a nursing infant persists as he is on the verge of preschool-hood. He mesmerizes himself and his legs begin to dangle.

Slowly, his eyes flutter shut and ginkie hangs from a slack mouth. I continue rocking, savoring another ordinary night.