Thursday, January 19, 2017

Writing Vomit: Week 2: Dream Vomit

About a week ago I had this extreme dream where I dreamed I was dreaming and I couldn't wake up. But I might have been dreaming that I dreamed I was dreaming that I was dreaming and I couldn't wake up. So part of the dream had me partially waking up to find that I'm in a hospital, intubated, and I can't explain what happened to me.

Before that revelation, I was overseeing a village where (maybe?) I was the head of the village who had built a large "castle" on a hill, and had 4 families living in cottages below. All was well for a while until the "castle" family wanted to use cedar to make their castle prettier. In the dream the other families resented having to use wood from the former castle to improve their homes. The castle was built with cedar and huge windows. In my dream it was a paradise, yet many of the peoples populating the area were unhappy.

I also had a dream sequence where I sort of knew I was dying. It included seeing a bulletin board with different articles posted, but also photos that I recognized of my biological kids and some of my kids from school. I noticed a comic strip highlighted with elephants (I am currently reading a book that elephants play a major part in) that perhaps I had in my "life" published. I had the sense that the bulletin board was showing the dying me what I would miss if I died then.

The part where I was near death in my dream was really unpleasant. I remember calling out in my dream for my husband to wake me up. I wonder if I called out anything in real life.

If dreams are our subconscious way of dealing with issues in our lives, I wonder what this is telling me. Am I close to death or does it mean something else?

Edit: I am thinking the focus on death is the death of our country. I try not to write about politics online because I hate confrontation and I hate losing friends and family over stuff we really have little control over. My one vote did little. Our country is broken. Trump makes me sick to my stomach. He has no respect for anyone and I can't figure out why people I know and some that I love support him. If you love someone with a disability, or someone who has survived an assault, or someone who has arrived in the USA from another country...if you believe appointees should know basic knowledge of the area they are nominated to fulfill, please continue to protest.

I feel like I need 3 times the anxiety meds.

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Deborah said...

I so hear you, especially your last paragraphs. I too fear for our country and our own sanity. It's going to be a difficult 4 years :-( We need to stick together and continue to not accept hate, racism, mysogyny and outright disrespect.

 
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