Friday, August 6, 2010

This Doesn't Just Happen to Me, Right?

Once upon a time there were hundreds of bloggers gathering in New York City for fun, for discussions, for networking. In other parts of the country there were people who either didn't blog at all or perhaps did blog but just didn't have the resources to go to NYC for BlogHer in 2010. There was at least one woman who was a little bitter that she didn't get to go, because she used to live in New York. She wanted to go, but going would require several things that she couldn't sacrifice. First, money. She couldn't see spending that money on herself. It is money she could use to have fun with her kids. Second, she'd miss her family. She's a homebody and loves her family fiercely. If she goes on vacation, there better be a family member in attendance. Third, she's quiet, shy, socially awkward (which I am sure a lot of bloggers are...we are the nerds).

So. Instead I experience #homeher2010.

Here's my Home Her experience yesterday.

My husband told me the cat needed food and litter. There is only one place in town left that carries the litter our cat uses so that requires a visit to the actual grocery store. I had thoughts of visiting the FAIR even though I had decided not to visit again this year.

So D and I went to the grocery store. We bought some stuff. She got her free cookie. She wanted her free balloon but I was (TM) Mean Mommy and said no this time. We bought our stuff and I decided to hit Panera for the chicken wild rice soup. D and I shared some soup and a half of a sandwich. I played Words With Friends (Heather51) and Scrabble. Also I felt really cool since I was the only person who had an iPad. Yes I am that cool.

The chicken and wild rice soup at Panera is mighty tasty.

I took her to the fair and we watched horse stuff. I have no idea what they were supposed to do but it was kind of cool. Horses jumped over crap. Occasionally the horses refused. One rider was thrown off her horse but she was fine.

We may have shared some fries. With cheese on top.

I randomly determined the exit time and just before I was going to strap D in her seat she uttered the words: "Ah Poopered." Nice.

It wasn't long before I realized a few things. One, she had poopered an explosive diarrhea that had soaked through her shorts. Two, there was shit on the stroller and pretty much the lower half of my adorable little girl. Three, I had approximately 3 baby wipes to handle what was clearly a throw in the bathtub kind of poop. Four, I needed to pick my big kids up from school in less than a half an hour.

Improvising as best I could I located the tub of Wet Wipes and figured it wouldn't hurt to use those in such a situation. Then I pulled out the last wipe in the tub. So that plan worked out well.

Apologizing to my sweet baby girl, I threw a clean pull-on on her still sort of dirty butt, trying to ignore her pointed protests about the shit still on her thighs. I know Baby, we have to go home to finish cleaning up. Her agreeable nature made me feel even guiltier Uh huh Mama.

But here's how I make myself feel better. I got home, cleaned her up, threw the shitty stroller outside, got her clean clothes AND made it to school in time to pick up the Bigs.

That reminds me. I should fill up the wipes in the diaper bag.

3 people like me!:

Madeline said...

I'm just impressed that you got to the bigs on time.

great auntie sue said...

i'll go to that blogher thingie in NY next year with you, i could be your socially awkward companion- that's assuming it's in NY

Holly at Tropic of Mom said...

"Ah poopered." Even during a full-on diaper blowout, she is so cute. I'm sorry you had to deal with that! Ugh.

I like to think though, maybe you were eating some great soup at Panera while playing online games with me....

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