Saturday, November 7, 2009

Whatever Happened To Manners?

Sometimes progress and technology are very bad things. People no longer connect beyond a superficial level. You used to know your butcher, your grocer, your postal carrier. I don't know the man who delivers my mail. I have a slight relationship with some of the people at one branch of our local post office, merely because I choose to go there to ship packages when people buy stuff from my shop.

This lack of connection seems to allow people to forget common manners...or maybe it's just my city. I guess when I've been in other cities the salespeople have been more pleasant. My city is full of people who have a strong sense of entitlement.

Clerks in stores no longer think it's necessary to thank you for your purchase. Instead, they hand you your receipt and say "here you go" as though they are doing you a favor.

I went into one store for the first time ever (so it was a liquor store, so?) and the clerk barked at me "what's your birth date?" I looked at him incredulously because it's quite obvious I am older than 21. I thought he was joking. No. "What's your birth date?" he barked at me again. The cash register apparently required him to enter a birth date before he could ring in the sale. I told him the date, he took my money and said "here you go" as he handed me my receipt. I said "you're welcome" as he rolled his eyes and thought I was a bitch.

Honestly, how hard is it to treat people nicely? If you don't like your job, find another one. If that's not possible, find some joy in the work you are currently doing. Why spread the misery? Sometimes all it takes is a shift in your own perspective to make a job more enjoyable.

How could this exchange at the store gone better?

Clerk: "Hello" [smiling] "Could I have your birth date please?"
Me: [pleasantly surprised that someone is courteous] "suchandsuchadate" (Did you really think I'd post that info? Come on!)
Clerk: "Thank you" [rings up sale] "That will be $10.35."
[I pay.]
Clerk: "Here's your receipt. Thank you!"

{end scene}

It's a similar tale at other stores that want to know your zip code so they can track where their customers are coming from. "Zip code?" the cashier will demand. Maybe it takes longer to be polite, but what's a few words to make an exchange better? "Could you please tell me your zip code?" sets the tone for the transaction at a much nicer note.

I worked in retail for I think 14 years. I can admit I wasn't always happy to be at my job, but I always thanked the customer and I almost never acted like I was bothered they were there. (I say almost never because there was that one time, a story for another day.)

Is it really just my city that has rude salespeople? (Although the people at our post office are really fantastic. I'm thinking I need to do something to acknowledge that.) Do you agree that technology and the impersonal nature of the Internet is to blame for the decline of simple manners?

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Sandy said...
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Chelsea said...

I think I know the cashier that you are talking about, I've had one @ Tar-jay never say thank you but only says "here you go" when they give me the recept, how rude!

chelle said...

I know my mail carrier's name! She rocks and always offers to go get me a coffee or anything I might need. She is a diamond in the rough though.

I agree we are much more disconnected as a society. Here everyone is crazy friendly to the point where you have to leave yourself extra time doing stuff because people are bound to chat!

 
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