I'm M, K, and D's Mother

::Blows the dust off::

Life has been busy enough that I haven't been writing here. Not that it wasn't busy when I was writing here regularly, but I've been editing photos and making crafts and participating in craft shows...and watching important television like the Survivor finale and the Gossip Girl series finale.

I'm working on clearing out extra things that we no longer need by listing them for sale on a local Facebook page. Getting some money for the things is making it easier for me to let go of some things, clothes etc, that might be a little harder to release. Most of the kids' outgrown clothes I can still see them in and it's hard for me to let go of those images...yet I know I don't want to be the hoarder lady with 50 cats and bags of feces stacked to the ceiling.

Our cat. I miss her, and then I don't. I'm shocked at both the times that her absence strikes me and then I'm equally shocked at how often I don't notice she's gone. I feel callous that I even typed this information. I will never, ever, forget the moment she was gone though.

So, the Connecticut tragedy. I told my kids what happened. I picked the Bigs up a little early from school on Friday (only 10 minutes early) and when we got in the car I told them what had happened. The truth is, my kids are pretty resilient and the deaths in our own family recently have affected them more than even a tragedy of this magnitude could.

On Monday, I drove my Bigs to school as usual. I wanted to keep them home, but I know that letting fear rule our lives is futile. I got an extra kiss from them and let them go...exactly as it should be.

D, my four-year-old love, noticed the flag at half-staff and asked if someone had died. (I've always talked about why the flag is at half-staff...September 11th, when a police officer was shot and killed, etc. I felt it important they knew the symbolism and respect.) I told her simply, "yes, someone died." She responded, "Why do people keep dying?" I had no answer for her. I wish I knew.

I keep the lines of communication open with my kids. I tell them when bad things happen. I tell them when good things happen. I don't think it's possible to shield our kids from the bad, and perhaps it will make them appreciate the good all the more.

Of course I have no idea if I'm doing the right thing. I'm just doing what I think is right and hoping for the best.