My kids mean the world to me. Family in general, actually, but for the sake of this post I'm talking about my children. The children I wanted badly. The children I had to try, try, try again to conceive. (Making me unable to relate to those who have "accidents.")
My children also drive me insane. There are days that I'm quite sure they are trying to kill me.
I love hugs and kisses. BUT, I can admit there are some days that I am pretty sure I can't stand another kid in my face. Please tell me I am not alone. My son and youngest are especially clingy some days. They get right in my face. They sit on my lap every time I sit down. They touch me everywhere.
I LOVE MY CHILDREN. I love hugs and kisses. Make no mistake about that. BUT.
Some days there is too much contact. Kids don't understand personal space and it is something I value highly. Most days it doesn't bother me a bit. But there are still those days that I have to ask for space.
I'm probably damaging my kids...just like with all the other parenting mistakes I've made.
At the same time that I'm sure I'm screwing up parenting, I also know that my heart is guiding me. I know my kids love me. I know what they need. I know that they will always rebel. It is as much their jobs to push and test us as it is for us to teach them.
But it is frustrating. I occasionally wish for no faces or fingers thrust in my face. I know this is a short time of life. I will probably look back at this time and want it back...even with the space violations. No, I KNOW I'll want it back.
Knowing all this, I still long for a time in the bathroom without one or more kids bursting in on my private time. I know my job is to teach these kids to grow and leave me. Someday I'll want this back.