Tuesday, November 17, 2009

More Stuff They Don't Tell You About Motherhood

If you don't have kids yet and don't want the bubble burst, please read no further. These are some things that no one told me about motherhood.

  1. You'll buy 26817 pairs of gloves and 673 hats and still won't be able to find what the kids need when the temps dip.
  2. You'll want desperately to make the same type of scrapbook/ baby book for each of your kids as you did for your first born but never really have the time to do it. Take comfort in the fact you can do it when they're older. Compromise.
  3. When your kids experience disappointment, you will feel it cut at your heart.
  4. You will have to cut fingernails and toenails seemingly every other day.
  5. It is breathtakingly wonderful to fill your child up with good feelings and good attitudes. When they smile reluctantly, trying to hide their pleasure? I think I love that the best. (The smile always wins and betrays the real feeling.)
  6. Your kids will emit spectacular farts and you will be amazed that a little body can produce such force.
  7. Your carpeting will be stained with vomit, juice, etc. and you'll remember the incidents that caused the stains.
  8. It won't be a big deal.
  9. You will probably have to clean poop off of carpeting more than once.
  10. One day someone will point out the sacrifices you've made for your kids and you'll realize you didn't think they were sacrifices at all.

8 people like me!:

Jules said...

Love this. Teared up at the end a bit - what? Don't look at me like that, just hand me a kleenex, yo...

Life As I Know It said...

Great list!

I'm HOPING I complete my younger ones baby/scrap book before he graduates college ;)

mayberry said...

What is it with the nail clipping! It's insane!

slouchy said...

Number one... YES!

chelle said...

Number 10 is my favourite!

wheelsonthebus said...

nails grow faster in a growth spurt, too.

Jeff said...

These are very good. Let me know if you want to publish my version of this about teens. I heard it was responsible for raising the vasectomy rate by 80%.

Gunfighter said...

Number one made me laugh aloud!

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